A shortcut to some great Best Man speech ideas

So, you’re staring at a blank sheet of paper asking yourself: what are the funny stories about the groom? Where on earth are those knock-out Best Man speech ideas?

This is the best way to give yourself writers’ block and is one of the reasons why so many Best Men panic. Here’s one of the biggest insights I’ve learned writing gags for TV shows and books: start from the serious, mundane or everyday and the comedy will come.

Don’t ask yourself: what’s funny? Ask yourself: what’s true?

One of the best ways to do this is to interrogate yourself about the groom. If you want a flight of fancy, imagine it’s wartime, you’ve just been captured and the enemy want to know EVERYTHING about him.

Here are some example questions that will lead to all those Best Man speech ideas.

Personal grooming

  • What’s his dress sense like? Sharp-dressed man or scarecrow?
  • Does he look in every mirror that he passes?
  • Is his moisturiser budget the size of a small country’s GDP


  • Can he hold his drink or does he have the liver of a sparrow?
  • Does he think he’s a beer or wine connoisseur? “This has notes of strawberries and sawdust…”
  • Has he fallen asleep in his pants…on the last train home…on the pavement?


  • What’s his driving like? Crazily fast or like he’s transporting a priceless Ming vase.
  • In the time he takes to park, could you write a parking ticket or a novel?
  • Is his car to get him from A to B or does he send it Valentine’s cards?


  • Does he like a flutter quite often?
  • Are his tips a brilliant get-poor scheme?

General character

  • Is he ambitious or laid back?
  • What’s his timekeeping like? Punctual or dysfunctional?
  • Is he hard-working or gets away with what he can?
  • Is he obsessively tidy or would he happily live in a pit?

Home life

  • Can he cook? Is it incredible or inedible?
  • If someone stole all his possessions, which would he notice was missing first: the fridge or the TV?


  • Is he first to the bar or does he hide under the table when it’s his round?
  • Does he spend money like it’s his last day on Earth?

Opinions and general knowledge

  • Is he always right?
  • Does he love trivia? Could he name Elton John’s cat’s middle name?


  • There’s a party – is he at the centre of it or lurking in the kitchen?
  • Can he dance? Should he dance?

Social Media

  • Does he live his life on Instagram and Facebook?
  • Did he stalk his fiancée on social media before they dated?


  • Does he support a football team he’s never watched live?
  • Is he competitive? Would he make no concessions when playing a child at a game?


  • Would he queue overnight outside a store to buy the latest gadget?
  • Is he a technophobe who uses his friends or kids as IT support?
  • Does he think HTML is a boy band?


  • Has he been to the ends of the Earth or just the end of the road?
  • Have you been on holiday together? Are you still trying to recover?

Seek and you will find

There is always material about the groom. It’s in your subconscious somewhere and you just need to bring it to the surface.  Go on. Try it. Ask yourself the right questions and you’ll get the right answers.

Need more inspiration? Take a look at my Best Man speech tips page. A great guide on how to generate ideas and shape it all into a knock-out speech.

Good luck!

Would you like some support with your speech? Why not check out my services?